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[DOTA]D07
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Joined: 20 May 2003
Posts: 498
Location: At my PC
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 Posted: Sat Aug 19, 2006 4:03 pm Post subject: Jokes |
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Since there haven't been that many new topics started recently (apart from Das Mole's, except they dont really count  ) So this is a place to put things you think are funny.... I will start the ball rolling:
| Quote: | A blonde while driving down the road saw a sign board saying, "Watch for Fallen Rocks."
After few kilometers, She saw some rocks at the side of the road, so she stoped and picked them up.
When she went to the next town, She carried those rocks into the Highway Maintenance Office, dropped them at the counter and asked the officer.
"Here are your fallen rocks, Now where is my watch?" |
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The Big Bad Wolf
Level 6: The Experiment
Joined: 03 Sep 2003
Posts: 214
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| Posted: Tue Sep 05, 2006 10:41 am Post subject: |
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Here we go guys. The Big Bad Wolf has returned. He has been long gone for a while now but he has come back an wants to hunt again.
Okay, here is a good joke.
"Doctor, "What seems to be the problem?"
Patient, "Doc, I've got the farts. I mean I fart all the time,"
The Doctor nods, "Hmm."
Patient, "My farts do not stink and you can't hear them. It's just that I fart all the time. Look, we've been talking here for about 10 minutes and I've farted five times. You didn't hear them and you don't smell them, do you?"
"Hmm," says the Doctor,
He picks up his pad and writes out a prescription.
The patient is thrilled "Great doc. This prescription, will it really clear up my farts?"
"No," sighs the Doctor, "The prescription is to clear your sinuses. Next week I want you back here for a hearing test."
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[DOTA]D07
Moderator
Joined: 20 May 2003
Posts: 498
Location: At my PC
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| Posted: Fri Jan 05, 2007 12:49 pm Post subject: |
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| Quote: | A few months ago, there was an opening with the CIA for an assassin. These highly classified positions are hard to fill, and there's a lot of testing and background checks involved before you can even be considered for the position. After sending some applicants through the background checks, training and testing, they narrowed the possible choices down to 3 men, but only one position was available.
The day came for the final test to see which man would get the extremely secretive job. The CIA men administering the test took one of the men to a large metal door and handed him a gun. "We must know that you will follow your instructions no matter what the circumstances," they explained. "Inside this room, you will find your wife sitting in a chair. Take this gun and kill her. "The man got a shocked look on his face and said "You can't be serious! I could never shoot my own wife!" "Well," says the CIA man, "you're definitely not the right man for this job then."
So they bring the second man to the same door and hand him a gun. We must know that you will follow instructions no matter what the circumstances," they explained to the second man, "Inside you will find your wife sitting in a chair. Take this gun and kill her." The second man looked a bit shocked, but nevertheless took the gun and went in the room. All was quiet for about 5 minutes, then the door opened. The man came out of the room with tears in his eyes. "I tried to shoot her, I just couldn't pull the trigger and shoot my wife. I guess I'm not the right man for the job." "No," the CIA man replied, "You don't have what it takes. Take your wife and go the hell home."
Now they're down to one man left to test. Again they lead him to the same door to the same room and hand him the same gun. "We must be sure that you will follow instructions no matter what the circumstances. This is your final test. Inside you will find your wife sitting in a chair. Take this gun and kill her." The third man took the gun and opened the door. Before the door even closed all the way, the CIA man heard the gun start firing. One shot after another for 13 shots. Then all hell broke loose in the room. They heard screaming, crashing, banging on the walls. This went on for several minutes, then all went quiet. The door opened slowly, and there stood the third man. He wiped the sweat from his brow and said "You guys didn't tell me the gun was loaded with blanks! I had to beat her to death with the chair!" |
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