Positions Available

Yufster · Level 2: The Rescue Joined: 20 May 2003 Posts: 9

Right James? We're recruiting! Right? Yeah!

So far we need all the following people... James, add anything you can think of to this list. I'll be scouring the net for unsuspecting victi-- uh, unpaid employees. Think, in a few years, when I'm famous and you're all searching through trash for stale bread crusts and empty mcdonalds cartons to scrape out, you can keep yourself sane by dreaming of those days you worked in the same Internet Company as that amazing, beautiful, talented Lead Animator from Lucasarts. So do yourself a favour, and apply for the following positions! I might even write to you!

Okay people, let's see...

Animators
Yes! And there's no need to worry about what packages you'll need, because all you need is MS Paint. "What?!" You cry in horror, "MS Paint?! Only dorks and poor people use MS paint! And you can't animate with MS paint anyway!" Not so! Indeed, only poor people do use MS paint. James doesn't pay any of us. So indeed, we are poor people! However, when business booms in years to come, and we have sent biological weapons and SARS bombs to all the major game companies worldwide, people will bow to us, and we will purchase only the best of animation packages. And as for the other point, you can animate with MS paint, just not very well. I'll even show you how to do it!

Level Designers
You've always wanted this job, and now it could be yours! And how easy it is! Just design levels, using little boxes and explanations of how all the puzzles work together. It's your job to make sure nobody can get stuck, or screw themselves by solving one puzzle before another and suchlike. Even a monkey could do this job! Are you stupider than a monkey? Then apply now!

Room Designers
These lucky people will design ROOMS for the game! Imagine that on your CV! You might even become an interior decorater with such a wonderful experience in room design! One day, you might work in a palace, but most likely you'll be searching through trash for waste food and old shoes for your feet, because you spent all your time making rooms instead of getting a job. You idiot!

Lead Music Composer
Now. This really is a gem. You could be like all those wonderful musical people of the renaissance, like... Leonardo Da Vinci and Shakespeare. No, I'm just joking, everybody knows Shakespeare wasn't a musician! He was a Level Designer, silly! Dare you be the next De Wolfe? Then send all your samples to us, so we can rip them off and not pay you for them! Oh wait, we're not going to pay you anyway! Hahaha!

Puzzle Designer
You need to be really clever to do this. You need to be able to design puzzles that won't blow peoples heads up. We don't care how you do it. We have an extensive range of blow up dolls that James is throwing out (they were punctured) so you can test all your puzzles on those. It's not hard. It really isn't. Just send us your IQ results and we'll get laughing at you. I mean back to you.

There you have it! Send all your applications to Yufster@Yahoo.com, or James email, which I don't know offhand. Or at all, either. Ever wondered why Lucasarts only knocks out starwars games, or why Square keeps on producing crappy RPGs to fill in the gaping holes between the FF games? We don't know so we can't tell you, but we CAN let you be part of a happy, wonderful design team so you can be proud of your life. Next time somebody asks you what your job is, you can stand proud, stick out your chest and say, "I work in a virtually unknown games company. I can animate on MS paint!" and then when you get beaten up and thugs run off with your wallet, you can die happy knowing you made a difference in the world, and there'll be a little memorial in the credits of DOTA under my name.

So that Email again is YUFSTER@YAHOO.COM. Don't wait!

James · 3run Joined: 19 May 2003 Posts: 3756

Yeah, ok.

My e-mail is james_isaac@yahoo.com
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Guest · Posted: Mon Jun 23, 2003 12:53 pm Post subject:

Show us how 2 Exclamation

Yufster · Level 2: The Rescue Joined: 20 May 2003 Posts: 9

No. You sign a contract first you thieving bath turd.
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Das Mole · Emo Joined: 21 May 2003 Posts: 1018 Location: Chicago

i want to do puzzle design. i'm a little slow, but whatever.

here's my signature, since i can't really sign a contract:

x Das Mole

there you go! Very Happy

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puzzle designer. moderator.

Andrew · Level 5: Capture Joined: 25 Jun 2003 Posts: 72

I will help with teh puzzle design.

I am I am Andrew on the monkey island forums btw >.>

I really have no time to post there any more, so i dont.

[DOTA]D07 · Posted: Sat Jun 28, 2003 6:20 am Post subject:

I have asked already to be a puzzle designer so can i still be one u guys and if i can thanks Very Happy

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V1rus · Posted: Wed Mar 31, 2004 6:19 pm Post subject:

Maybe i can make music don't know gatta sheck somthing first Exclamation

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Even bigger newbie at free running then steve Very Happy

James · 3run Joined: 19 May 2003 Posts: 3756

This thread's pretty old though. We do have a musician already, but if you still want to help i'll ask him if it's ok.
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monkey_05_06 · Posted: Sun Apr 18, 2004 5:59 pm Post subject:

do ya'll still need help with anything? I can do anything except draw and play music. perhaps not well, but I'll try. jUst tell me what to do, and I can do it. and I can mix the music fairly well too. and compress it while keeping good quality. or not?
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James · 3run Joined: 19 May 2003 Posts: 3756

Do you think you could design the rooms, so basically we tell you what the puzzles are, and you design the room layout, and show where the objects go that are necesarry to do the puzzles... it doesn't really require any drawing abilities, because a rough sketch is fine - as long as we know where everything goes.

PS, welcome Smile

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monkey_05_06 · Posted: Wed Apr 28, 2004 1:36 am Post subject:

Yeah. I lost this site so you emailed me, and I replied to your email. Thanks. Just tell me the basic look of the room and explain the puzzles. You might actually have to explain it REALLY good. Lately there's been a mental block on my entire creativity gland. (***Creativity Gland? WTF?***) Ok, well yeah. That's great. Glad to here that ya'll still need help. STOP MAKING FUN OF MY ACCENT!

EDIT: Hey... I just had a funny idea. I was looking at your main site, and it says that voice acting is 0% complete. How do you think a fat Texan kid would rate at voice acting? My peers love me at school. I have no friends, but anytime I sing or read a play or something for fun... That sets them off... Yeah. that'd be great.
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James · 3run Joined: 19 May 2003 Posts: 3756

Yeah, voice acting would be ok. Just send me a demo tape and we'll see if you would fit with any of the characters.

And about the puzzles and stuff, we have a list of puzzles fully written out, so if i give you parts of that, you can work out what rooms are needed, and what should be in them. That ok?
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monkey_05_06 · Posted: Wed Apr 28, 2004 9:26 pm Post subject:

send you a demo tape??? wouldn't it be easier if I just posted a sound file on my website and linked you to it? I dunno... I'm just glad that I get to attempt to help. Keyword: "I get to attempt to help". ok.
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GPHemsley · Posted: Wed Apr 28, 2004 11:06 pm Post subject: